Ugh

Embarrassment may not be the most painful feeling of them all, but it certainly seems to come back again and again. And usually it's not even a big deal to others, they forget about it after they see it happen. But I always seem to remember my own mess ups, and the next time I think of it I feel almost as stupid as I did then, thinking I can never redeem myself or recover from these stupidities. The more I think about it too, the more I understand how stupid I was, which makes it even worse. I'm just a wreck when it comes to embarrassment, and I hate it. And the problem is, I don't even on the outside look like I want to impress anyone, but I guess underneath I still can't stand looking stupid or doing/saying something stupid. Shame on me for how much I am influenced by others...

Can you tell I recently had one of those embarrassing moments? Yeah, I thought so... ugh